Respect the power of Limonata and Cap'n Crunch's Crunch Berries

by Michael S. Kaplan, published on 2007/11/09 10:01 -05:00, original URI:

So non-technical that it's staggering -- stop reading now before you get sucked into it! 

Very little respect I get. Like a phone conversation last night with a friend who called me during dinner:

"What on earth are you doing?"

"I'm eating dinner. You called me at dinnertime, you take what you get, right?"

"True. But what is it? Are you still eating crap these days?"

"It's Crunch Berries and Limonata."

"Hmmm... well, I guess the milk can offset the junk food cereal, and Crunch Berries has some street cred."

"Milk? What milk?"

"Um, the milk you pour in the cereal bowl!"

"I have no milk in this house, I'm milk soluble."

"What does that even mean?"

"You ever see The Wizard of Oz?"

"Sure, everybody has!"

"That scene with The Wicked Witch and the melting? She was water soluble. So...."

"And you are milk soluble?"

"Yes, exactly."

"Michael, that is disgusting."

"You're the one who asked, Hun."

"Isn't that kind of sexist, calling me 'Hun' like that?"

"No, I mean it like as in 'Attila the' so it's not really sexist at all."

"I guess I can live with that. So you are eating dry sugar cereal and washing it down with a sugary drink."

"Well, first of all I am not eating the cereal dry, and second of all Limonata is 12% lemon juice."

"But if you aren't putting in milk then how is the cereal not dry?"

"Wait for it...."

"Michael, please tell me you did not pour Limonata into your cereal bowl."

"Okay, I won't tell you that."

"That is completely disgusting!"

"More disgusting or less disgusting than the 'milk soluble' thing?"

"It's a toss-up, Michael. But it gives me a great idea for a new diet."

"How's that?"

"Every time I'm going to eat a meal, I just have you tell me about what you're eating -- and boom! Suddenly I'm not hungry any more!"

"Glad I can provide that valuable service, and backwash is an effect I really have always worked hard to encourage in the women in my life."

"A job well done, young man!"

"Look, can I eat here?"

"I can't say for sure, Michael. Give it a try, though."

Like I said, very little respect I get.

But the Limonata and Crunch Berries thing? It actually works. Highly recommended....


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Chuck on 11 Nov 2007 10:06 PM:

This post right here?  This explains a lot more than the others do.

A lot.

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referenced by

2008/03/26 Cleaning up the water (globally) and hoping to get around better

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